Supplements for Marriage

Happy (Belated) Valentine’s Day, y’all! Vday got me thinking this year…

We take supplements for our bodies. We read and study hard for years to supplement our knowledge and our careers.

But how much time do you spend truly preparing for marriage? And once you’re in it, do you have any idea what you are doing at all?? Are you truly giving of yourself, or are you at least a LEEEEEETTLE bit selfish. Or a lot selfish.

Do you tell your significant other about all the things that he or she needs to improve on? Do you ever think about the things maybe YOU might need to improve on?

Recently at our church here in Columbus, our pastor embarked on a seven-week series on Marriage. This is how he begins…pointing out how very little we really DO to prepare for marriage, where just about every aspect of our life, from education to finances to pet ownership, is carefully planned out.

This series has been an incredible supplement to our marriage. About half way through, I think the hubster and I have already taken many, MANY lessons to heart. We are all human and we need HELP sometimes. We need guidance, mentorship, kind words, direction…and we should never be ashamed or embarrassed or scared to seek out what we need. I encourage you to watch this series, in your own time. Listen to the words and take notes. Read your notes back before bed, and pray for your marriage. Or read them when you wake up in the morning, instead of diving right into your to-do list or your work emails. I promise this will start to change your life.

Another wonderful tool I’ve been using in recent weeks is a book called, The Power of a Praying Wife. It is truly making many of the exact points as Pastor Kevin in his Marriage Sermon Series. While his sermons truly challenge and convict my heart in the best of ways, this book by Stormie Omartian focuses me on praying for my heart in our marriage, and for my husband on a daily basis. It is helping me build an even stronger foundation for our marriage.

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It doesn’t matter if you feel like your marriage is perfect right now, or if you aren’t even married, or if you aren’t even THINKING about marriage. No matter what, we should each always be working to improve ourselves for the many relationships we have in our lives. Do you need a more open and loving heart towards your family? Your coworkers? Strangers? It doesn’t just have to be your spouse. Think about how you are spiritually supplementing your relationships. Think about what sorts of help you may need, and begin to seek them out.

When A Man Cooks You Dinner

jonathan

Early on in our relationship, I would trek the 45 min+ to Jonathan’s condo after work, in rush hour, and would arrive to find him cooking dinner for us. Sometimes it was homemade pizza. Sometimes it was fish, black beans, and couscous. No matter what it was, knowing that I was going to walk in and have him tell me “just go sit down!” was the ultimate sign that he loved me. Even if he didn’t know it yet, I knew! AND, he eats so healthy, I became inspired and lost like, 15 or more pounds our first year together. Basically the opposite of the usual boyfriend effect*.

Now that we are married, we both cook a lot. Some dinners are quick and easy, some more complex, but most of the time, we are both in the kitchen getting things done. And I love this! It’s a whole different side of feeling loved and comfortable.

But this weekend was my birthday (Sunday), and while I really don’t care all that much about doing anything on my birthday (29 is a weird number), it was the strangest and awesomest feeling when he a) had breakfast ready for me when I got back from a run, and b) later “made me” go work on my crafting project and watch Game of Thrones (which he is not into) while he made me like this, gourmet Whole30 meal of turkey burger, guac, and sweet potato wedges.

Seriously, a flashback to our dating days. I love us cooking together, but I also love taking a break from time to time. All this to say, if a man is cooking for you early on, you are bound happy dinners all your life!

*The Boyfriend Effect is caused when I feel the freedom to eat just as much as my new boyfriend (and am more than capable) and so I gain like, a bazillion pound.